thescruffypiratedotorg

Surprisingly I agreed with a lot of the first 50. Usually these "how you should behave" lists make me angry but there was some good stuff in there. In particular I agreed with all the ones about not offering your own opinions. Oh, and I don't like #24.

One Hundred Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do (Part 1)

1 September 2010 02:00pm UTC • 119 views • 7 comments

Tagged with restaurants, serving, etiquette

7 comments

1. Peon Peetie

   2 September 2010 02:49am UTC

   Don't like 24?!! If someone pours one kind of drink into a glass, then after I finish pours another kind of drink into the same glass, I promise I will not return gladly to that place. If it's the same drink, be it beer (the same kind) or wine (from the same bottle), reuse the glass. But i don't want to taste coke if I'm drinking a sprite, and I don't want to taste fat tire if I'm drinking Sierra nevada. Furthermore, aside from fountain drinks, most beverages have special glasses. Chardonnays use a different glass than a cabernet, and every beer in the world should have it's own glass (though many American beers use a standard pint glass). I won't order certain kinds of wine or beer if they are served in the wrong glass, and I won't go back to a place if they serve me two drinks in the same glass. So, I agree 100% with #24.

   Also on my list, don't EVER ask "how are we doing tonight?" don't ever sit at my table. Don't ever tell me your name and that you'll be along care of me tonight. I could go on. And I probably will blog about this now.

2. Peon Peetie

   2 September 2010 03:01am UTC

   I don't get the lady one though. If I can't call a woman a lady, should I call her woman? Miss? Misses? I'll never call a man a dude, but what ore polite way to call a woman is there? One of the first comments even says don't call a woman "ma'am", so now I'm really confused.

3. Dread Pirate Benjamin

   3 September 2010 12:10am UTC

   Yeah, I very rarely order a second different drink while eating out. Free refills baby! And in that case the second drink absolutely should not come in a second glass. How wasteful.

   As for the lady one, may I suggest watching Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom again? "Hey Lady!"

4. The Anonymous Poppy

   5 September 2010 01:48am UTC

   I'm really glad that he prefaced his second 50 points with: "I realize that every deli needs a wisecracking waiter, most pizza joints can handle heavy metal, and burgers always taste better when delivered by a server with tattoos and tongue piercing(s)." Because I feel like most of these notes simply don't apply to the vast majority of restaurants. I get the feeling that these are rules for really fancy places. For which they are great! I like his attitude about the restaurant that he's going to be opening.

   Like, never bring the check until someone asks for it?? Um, do you walk past an empty water glass and wait until the guest asks for more water? Of course not. Watch the table and suit your service to the guests' needs (including the need for the check at the obvious end of the meal). In most restaurants, I would consider it a mark of great service to clearly but unobtrusively drop the check as soon as the guests decline the next step of the meal -- dessert, coffee, whatever. Excellent service is marked by anticipating the guests' needs -- ideally before they even know about them themselves.

   With regard to the "lady" question, a similar one was recently raised at dooce.com, about whether one should refer to people as "sir" and "ma'am." The proprietor of dooce.com was raised in Tennessee, and for her the answer was an unequivocal "Yes." But when I call people "sir" or "ma'am," it just sounds really sassy. Like I'm being a smartass. It isn't natural to the way I was brought up to use language. Likewise, it feels mildly insulting to me to be called "ma'am." "Miss" is pretty bad too, because it can imply that I'm very young, or (to the consideration of the speaker) particularly subservient.

   I think it can definitely be okay in many cases to refer to a woman as a lady ("The ladies at table 7 need a water refill, can you head over there?), but not to address a woman as "Lady." But in most cases, I think "women" would work just as well as "ladies" anyway. And when it won't, you can just structure your remark differently!

5. The Anonymous Poppy

   5 September 2010 01:52am UTC

   Ah, I missed a tag! I was just going to emphasize the words "refer" and "address" in the last paragraph!

6. Dread Pirate Benjamin

   7 September 2010 04:52am UTC

   Couldn't agree with you more about the check Poppy. As soon as "the next step" is declined bring me my check as quickly as possible!

   The ones I enjoyed about the list were about the serving staff being as unobtrusive as possible.

   The rest just remind me why I don't like fancy places.

7. Peon Peetie

   19 September 2010 07:06am UTC

   They remind me of why I love fancy places!

   I was just reminiscing about a dinner daisy and I had at tru, a five star establishment in Chicago. The food was great, but not what you'd expect for the amount of money we spent. But the service blew me so far out of the water that I'll recommend that place to anyone. I honestly can't think of anything they did that even kind of disappointed me.

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